8/25/2010

A guest blog from Mimi

Today's guest post is from the lovely Mimi @ Living in France. Check her blog out. She literally has me laughing out loud at every one of her posts. Thanks again Mimi!

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Hi Everyone!!
I'm so excited to be posting for Steph today!
Can you believe the little brat is actually on vacation? Wait. You don't know what vacation is? Neither do I!
I certainly haven't had one in the last eight years or so.
Not that I'm counting.
I have a vague memory as to what a vacation is...it seems like it was something that I did with my husband about once a year...? And maybe we went somewhere that isn't like the place that we live? We also relaxed a lot?
I don't know. Eight years is a long time.
Not that I'm counting.
Wait.
It's coming back to me now.
We did, indeed, have vacation! You know...once upon a time.
And now that I think about it, it was before two different things happened to me.
The first thing?
I had babies.
Second?
I got old.
Eight years ago, I was young. Eight long years.
Not that I'm counting.
You may wonder why a person who has kids can't go on vacation.
It's simple really. You can go on a vacation. You can go to all kinds of neat places. Have lots of fun.
But at the end of the day, if you've had to referee a fight between the kids, wipe a poopy butt, or utter the words, "If you make that sound one more time I'm gonna 'fill in the blank with whatever it is you wanna threaten em with at that moment,' then you really haven't been on a vacation.
Think about it. A poopy butt is a poopy butt no matter if you are at home or at Disneyland. Even though Disneyland is pretty fun. At least as I recall. I haven't been on vacation in eight years.
Not that I'm counting.
And when you find yourself telling your child, "You are so ungrateful. My parents never took me to 'fill in the blank with whatever place they really want to go to at this moment.' I think you're just spoiled. Back when I was a kid, we didn't have 'fill in the blank with whatever crap you didn't have when you were a kid.'"
Well, you know what it means when you find yourself spewing that stuff. That's when you know you're old.
And that it's time for a vacation.
Because you haven't had one in eight years.
Not that I'm counting.

Thanks, Steph, for having me! Hope you have a great vacation!!
I haven't had one in eight years!
Not that I'm counting.

9 comments:

CeCe said...

Vacations are the best! I wish I were on one. RIGHT NOW! I wish you a much deserved child free no poopy butt vacation in the near future. Sounds like you are due for one. RIGHT NOW!!

Helene said...

Yup, there is no thing as a vacation when you bring the rugrats along! This is a funny (and very true) post...a poopy butt is a poopy butt, no matter where you are!!!

obladi oblada said...

HA. That was awesome.
Youve never once guest blogged for me. (not that IM counting, lol).

Speaking of poopy diapers and the "happiest place on earth", last time we were there we were standing in line at Space Mountain, and someone had changed a poopy diaper right there off to the side of the line...and LEFT it there. It stunk so bad we all had a peice of mint gum stuck up to our noses so we wouldnt smell the diaper.

Babies arent even ALLOWED on that ride....so WTF?

Unknown said...

Ha ha you cracked me up! Go on vacay!!

Myya said...

I thought I've had a vacation but in your terms I SOOO have NOT! Well atleast not in the last 5 years. Yep, the whole baby thing :) Oh wait, I did have a weekend getaway with my sisters to Vegas (BUT I was 6 1/2 months pregnant at the time so really how much "real" fun could I have). Thanks for making me count Macey! Geesh!

shortmama said...

So thats what a vacation is! Interesting. The closest thing I get to vacation is camping...with the kids.

SurferWife said...

Get your booty down here on vacation already.

Jessica said...

I went on a vacation back when Jack was two. So, it's been 6 years. We went on a cruise without him. It was lovely.

TLF said...

Mimi, you crack me up.. always.