Facebook Funnies

It's once again time for "Facebook Funnies." Post all the weird, unusual, creepy, or funny statuses that make you go hmmmm! and then link back to here. Just don't use anyone's name, address, school, ect.

Feel free to grab the button.

<br /><br /><a border="0" href="http://www.imwatchingairplanes.blogspot.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://i116.photobucket.com/albums/o28/steph_ozzy/FF12Resized209x200.jpg" /></a><br /><br />

Here we go...

Either I have the flu or I have accidentally poisoned myself. It's really a toss up......

How could you accidentally poison yourself?

WARNING!!! As of tomorrow, Facebook will creep into your bathroom when you're in the shower, fondle you butt, and pinch in you uncomfortable places. To change this option, go to Privacy Settings>Personal Settings>BathroomSettings>Fondling & Pinching Settings, and uncheck the Shenanigans box. Facebook kept this one quite. Copy & Paste on your status to alert the unaware.

I better check that one out.

URGENT WARNING!!! Facebook now automatically scans your brain through your monitor. To block, go to kitchen, get aluminum foil, and wrap it around your head. Stay calm and breathe through your left nostril ONLY. This is a SERIOUS problem and has been confirmed by a cousin's girlfriend's neightbor's son's baby's mama and her pet chihuahua.

Oh no!

My car horn is too embarrassing. If you are ever out for a walk and you think a cartoon roadrunner is trying to get your attention, that's just me. Mmmeee Mmeep!

Awww... how cute!

Would it be rude if I offered the gross man sitting next to me on the [train] a piece of gum? Seriously gonna vomit.

Don't you hate it when that happens.

Woke up a bit late this morning... but made it to class on time.... i definately didnt here my alarms....

Good thing you made it because it appears you could use all the class time you could get.

[The school I go to] College will be open tomorrow. If anything changes, we will share the information through our traditional channels. We're glad everyone is sharing their thoughts, but we ask that you avoid using profanity. Thanks!

I loved going to my college's facebook when the weather was bad. It was full of post from people complaining about how school should be closed. I'm pretty sure they don't know base their decision to close the school on what is posted on their facebook wall. It also reconfirms that 95% of the people that go to school there are idiots.

HELL YEAH! Just beat my own record for consecutive days alive!

I think everyone does this everyday.

I don't know what's more annoying people who don't make since on here. Or people who can't spell. Ok ok its just me irritated [name]. that's me! But seriously check your post before you post it. Don't sound like a retard and people might respond.

Since... I believe it's sense. And you have a sentence fragment thrown in there.

I wish peep would stop talkin [crap] 2 my soon 2 b x hubby. Our biz is our biz! Stay the [heck] out of it! We have kids 2gather. You wanna ruin my kids life 2! F^*&$ off! I'm done with this [crap]!

And then the next day....

Well that talk went [crappy]! Why even try? I don't give a [crap]!

Why do you put your business on Facebook if you don't want people getting involved?

thinks that sometimes all it takes is being snowed in at work for a couple days to appreciate a good day off.... and whiskey.

Getting snowed in at work? That sounds horrible. That might make me turn to whiskey too.


Feel free to link up and share.

Happy Thursday!

I'm ready for spring break

I thought I better pop in and let you all know that I'm still alive. This semester is becoming increasingly overwhelming for me so I've had my nose in a book and not any books I want to be reading for the last week or so.

Matt had drill this past weekend. I always look forward to him having drill but then by Saturday evening I always miss him. I can only talk to the dogs so much before I start to question my sanity.

In my formatting class, I typed 22 (twenty-two) business letters this weekend. And proofread them. It's a good thing I'm a fast typer.

I got my first B since I started going back to school last week. (In my Accounting class) The good news is I didn't cry or punch anything or anyone.

I have my first test in my Business Law class this week. I don't understand the stuff really. Also, after you are screwed over by the legal system it makes a person a little turned-off by the whole thing. Anywho, I got my study guide all ready to go and I'm going to start cramming tonight.

The snow/ice melted this weekend and the sun was out, which made me happy.

I'm going to post "Facebook Funnies" on Thursday and be on the look out for something very exciting around the beginning of next week.

Hope you all had a great Valentine's Day!

Who needs a Wii

When Matt was in Iraq and shortly after, he had an addiction. An addiction to buying junk online. We would be instant messaging and he'd take forever to answer and I'd ask him what he was looking at. He would tell me the most random stuff. (clothes for Ozzy, toy tractors, miniature motorcycles, ect.) I have another story for another day I can tell you about some of the crazy stuff he ordered.

This story is about an Nintendo Power Pad. Anybody remember those? Anybody?

Definitely not my picture

It's basically a two-sided mat that you can hook up to the Nintendo. I'm talking about the 1980s original Nintendo.


Matt bought one on eBay I think shortly after we were married. It only has two games for it. Matt had originally only purchased a track and field game for it. I played it a couple times. I suck at it.


Matt's power pad, well technically it's more mine because I've never once seen him use it, is in our spare bedroom. The spare bedroom also doubles as my working out room.

About 2 weeks ago, Matt was junk hunting on the Internet again and found the other game that goes with the power pad for like 4 bucks. It's a dance aerobics game. So he asked if I wanted him to buy it for me. I thought, "sure". Maybe it would help me get good enough to be able to go to a Zumba class without having people laugh and point at me.
There are a couple different things you can do with the game. The first involves passing certain levels. After about 4 tries, I passed level one. It was intense. Level 2 involved me doing some kind of crab maneuver and I failed miserably.

At one point, she had me jumping up and down and slapping the floor. Poor little Vinnie thought I'd lost my mind. Every time I'd hit the floor, he'd bark and run out of the room. He'd come back at the exact time I was hitting the floor again. Repeat about 7 times.

The second thing I tried was more like just follow along and if you mess up it doesn't really matter. At the end of that she told me, "You need to practice your dance aerobics."

She almost killed me. She's mean, too skinny, and quite frankly, I think she enjoys putting me down. Plus her leg warmers are ridiculous.

My legs burned for like 3 days after I did it. That was Friday. I'll let her ridicule me some more again soon. I should have let her last night but I wanted to catch up on some DVR while I worked out. Oh well. Someday, I'll show her what's up.

Question for you though, what should I name her? I mostly call her the names that I shouldn't say on here. She needs a real person's name. Remember she's straight up 80s.

MckLinky Monday

Today, I'm linking up with RHOK for the Monday MckLinky. The topic is to name and elaborate on my top 5 pet peeves. Only 5, that's tough. I have a ton of pet peeves. I guess you could say that I'm easily annoyed.



1. The saying "It is what it is" - No shit. If it were not what it is, it would be something else. I truly can not stand this saying.

2. Pop music - I think 99% of pop artists are no talent ass hats. Luckily, I can normally go with out having to listen to it. The only time I'm subjected to it is when we go to the bar. I'm thankful for my iPod.

3. Lack of manners while eating - I can't stand slurping or people who talk with food in there mouth. Seriously, there is a lady idiot I work with that talks on the phone to customers while eating. Gross.

4. Receiving a text that says "k" - At least give me a "yes," "no," or "sounds good". Not really sure why but this drives me nuts.

5. Liars - I especially hate when a person tells so many lies that they can't keep their lies straight. Also, people who make their life sound perfect. No one's life is perfect so stop acting like you shit rainbows.

Monday's are a great day to list my pet peeves. I could do this every Monday.

Happy Monday!

I'm here

The last few days have been crazy. Unless you've been living under a rock, you know that the mid-west got pounded with ice and then snow. I'm not one to use the weather to make conversation so I'll spare you the details.

The funeral was Sunday. It was really sad. Matt was a pallbearer. His dress pants were about 3 sizes too small. My smallest black pants were about 2 sizes too big. I may have called him a fatass repeatedly once or twice.

I can't even remember what else we did last weekend. Must have been exciting.

Yesterday, I worked from home. We didn't have internet until about noon but I had a ton of stuff that I could do without the internet.

Pro's of working from home:

- Sleeping in

- Staying in my pajamas until I took a shower on my "lunch break". And then I put on clean pajamas.

-Having the pups sit by me on the couch

- Not having to deal with anyone I work with

- Eating when I wanted to

- Perhaps most importantly, the coffee is better at home.

- Getting more done in one day on the couch than I could in three days at work

- Watching day time TV. I'm totally envious of anyone that gets to watch court shows and the Price is Right everyday.

Con's of working at home:

- I can't really do all of my work at home since I don't have our software on my laptop so there was a big pile of crap waiting for me this morning.

- Matt asking 2487 times if they internet was working and why I hadn't call them yet.

- Matt whining that he was hungry.

- The pups bark at every leaf that falls.

If I could send Matt to work everyday, I'd give my left arm to be able to work from home. Seriously, I'm not that big of a "people person" anyway.

Hope you are all doing well!